Elegy to My Mother
(It's time....)
You took the time
to try and
relegate me
to a part of your
life
where I could be
viewed – at your leisure
You took the time
to try and
relegate me
to a part of your
life
where I could be
used – at your pleasure.
You took the time
to try and
relegate me
to a part of your
life,
where I felt as if
I didn’t matter
And when I was
tired
of being RELEGATED
and spoke out,
Cried out
you took the time
to try and force
me into a place,
where you would
find comfort
but I would be
left
Feeling unworthy.
You’ve allowed
Made it ok
And even joined in
When people
Talked about me
Lied on me
Disparaged me –
and my character
Caused me to doubt
Who I was
What I was
And the value that
I have
In this world
And although I
fought against it
You – and others
Were hellbent
On trying to
Relegate me
Back to that place
Where you could
Try to
Control me
Today,
I finally
Liberate myself
Today,
I finally
Free myself
From the bondage
Physically
Emotionally
Spiritually
Of loving you
Of caring about
you
Of wishing that
you
And I
Were better
Were closer
Were stronger
That you
Would be
Open
Willing
Able
To accept
Me
As I am
For who I am
And who I am
To you.
I would be lying
If I didn’t
Acknowledge
If I didn’t
Accept
The pain
The hurt
The misery
That
This decision
Causes me
But
It’s better than
The pain
The hurt
The misery
That your neglect
Your abandonment
Your disregarding
Of my feelings
Of my love
Of me
Has caused
So
Although
The love remains
And you will
Forever be
In my
Thoughts
My heart
My prayers
And on
My mind
I release you
And all that comes
with
Loving you
So that I can
Truly
And honestly
Love myself.
Dejanique, the
Cocoa Poetess™
©November 26, 2013
